Tag Archives: Maturity

Love and Truth.


I’ve never wanted a relationship.  

I was always inspired by hermits.

I used to mail formal invites to my “break-up parties” that were held within a week of ending a relationship.

I used to have major panic attacks at weddings and bridal showers, so I stopped trying to go to them at all.  I knew people wouldn’t understand the anxiety I felt, so  I would just mail gift cards after the fact.

At weddings, when the couple recited the vows, I would see shackles and hear words of ownership being spoken. 

I had a panic attack halfway down the aisle of my own wedding and literally needed both of my parents to walk me.  They were whispering encouraging words, “Keep going.  You’re okay. “

My marriage became abusive within the first two years. 

I regretted forcing myself to do something that was clearly so unnatural for me.

I was excited to get divorced.  I didn’t have a party, but I have celebrated my freedom every day since he left. 

It’s  been four years since my divorce was final.  

I feel Whole.  Complete.  Healed.  Powerful.  Intuitive.  Devine.  Royal.  Precious.  Loveable.  Amazing. And Aligned with Spirit and Truth.

I don’t want to jeopardize any of that by adding another person to the equation who will interfere with the progress I’ve made.  

Some people can be needy.  Clingy.  Manipulative.  And unintentionally controlling.  I’m so in love with my personal growth and ascension journey, I have no interest in compromising that for the sake of a romantic relationship.  Time is an illusion and this may or may not be my last lifetime.  

Either way, I’m  enjoying my journey without a man so much that I don’t want a man if I can’t continue to grow and flourish as I have these past four years.  

I am so much better!  I want more! I am in LOVE with growing!!!  If he can’t pour into my soul, I don’t want him.  

If all he can do is focus on the physical aspects of me and things of this temporary, 3D realm, he’s not for me.  

“He” will be my King, not my student.

“He” will pour into my being, rather than deplete me.

“He” will show me with his actions that I am in great hands. 

“He” will not run from my truth.

“He” will empower me with his consistency and be patient as I allow myself to trust him.  

“He” will encourage me through his energetic vibration.

His higher self will speak to mine and say “Keep going.  You’re okay” …….

And I will believe “Him” and let myself love again. 

I won’t be “His” and “He” won’t be mine, 

We will simply just  “Be” together in love. ūüíĖ



Why I’m single…..for now.

I never really thought about why I was single until one day, someone asked me, and I was stuck.  I didn’t really have a simple answer.  I didn’t even really know where to start.  I just sat there, dumbfounded.  I thought to myself, “I guess I need to think about how to articulate this in case I’m asked again.”

I continued living my life as I normally do and tried to feel where a relationship would fit and what I would want in a partner and why.  It wasn’t easy.  I’m very busy and I’m also very content.  I meditated and asked the question, “why am I single?”.

After a few days of listening for the answer, this is what I realized:

‚ÄčI get a lot of 5D (spiritual) assignments that require me to use my spiritual gifts to assist people, some I know and most are strangers.  It is my priority to stay in spiritual alignment regardless of who is in my life and in what capacity they are in it.  Sometimes, 3D relationships and all the pettiness that goes into dating is just a big distraction.  I believe the person for me will gravitate towards me and enhance my vibe rather than cause interference with my energetic frequency.  Most men don’t even know what I’m talking about, so they could never really support me on this journey.  Besides that, being whole and knowing that I have all I need inside of me, changes my perspective of relationships.  I have already been married and divorced.  I have two children.  I don’t feel like I’m lacking or need to pursue anything. This physical life is temporary anyway.  “The One” is a relative illusion based on where we are at any given point in our lives. For me, there are more important things to focus on…..like fulfilling my divine purpose in life and raising the vibration of this planet.  

If I ever have a King, he will be on the same mission that I am on, or at least, he will understand that every now and then I have to put on my cape and channel someone’s ancestor or transitioned loved one.  I may see him unexpectedly through my third eye and have to call him out of nowhere to deliver a message from the Divine.  He may have a thought that I hear or feel from miles away and I am instructed to help keep him on course with his Divine purpose.   This is my life.  This is what I do, with or without him in it.  He has to be willing to go deep within himself and maintain his own connection and alignment to Source, while giving me the trust, respect, and freedom to fulfill my 5D to-do list.  Obviously, I would love to support him with his own life mission and journey to ascension.  It would give me no greater pleasure than to be the Queen to my King and give him the trust, respect, and freedom to fulfill his own destiny while he does the same for me.

If he is moving through life aligned with his higher self, and I am too, not only could we manifest some amazing stuff together, it would be the most exhilarating, soul quenching relationship ever!

If it’s supposed to happen, it will.  In the meantime, I am in the avatar of my Higher Self.  Chilling…….until further notice.


How loudly must we cry in order to be heard?

How bad does it have to get before we are understood?

If I have a flashback and cry in class

All you do after everyone laughs

Is tell me: 


I wish you would take me to the side

Give me some tissue for my eyes,

Maybe a hug would be good 

If you sincerely felt like you should.

But instead, you just tell me:


What am I supposed to do?

Who am I supposed to go to?

I am the voice of those unheard

Those who have had their dreams deferred.

Parents who are stressed

Teachers who are overwhelmed

Children with arms outstretched

Longing to be rescued.

We can’t forget how we 

got here so how can we:


From sitting in the desk

To now standing behind it

A single parent of two little ones

No words can describe this

Feeling of fear and despair

Yet hopeful determination.

We are resilient.

We are creative. 

But we need our next generation!

Only in love and unity will we:


We don’t have a choice

I wish more would raise their voice

Rather than suffer in silence

Trying to keep their faces fixed

I wish less would talk and more would listen

It would completely change their disposition.

If they could hear our ancestors guide us

They wouldn’t just lead, but they would help us survive this.

Then we could:


One thing I’ve learned in life

Is we can’t depend on someone else’s dime

We must rise to our feet

Brush the dust off our sleeves.

Sit still in meditation,

And follow our intuition

We must fill ourselves with love

Overflowing with power from above

Grab the hands of our neighbors 

Lift them up in praises

And together let us all say:


‚ÄčPassionate, Not Clingy.

I will give you, and only you, my undivided attention.

I will focus on you, deliberately.

I will try to learn and understand you.

I will be patient when we are on different frequencies.

I will continuously pursue my own spiritual alignment.

I will filter my emotions and avoid blaming you for “my stuff”.

I will sacrifice in order to compromise, if it’s for the best of our mutual interest.

I will express my appreciation for you.

I will learn lessons about myself and life through the experience of dealing with you.

I will try.

I will face my fears and challenge myself to overcome them.

I will enjoy the process of getting to know you.

I will take my time.

I will give you space when I feel you need it.

I will take space for myself when I know I need it.

I will honor you.

I will respect you.

I will listen to you.

I will open my heart to you.

I will not demand or expect anything of you.

I will forgive you.

I will allow you to treat me the way you want to treat me.

If I don’t like it, 
I will let you go.

How to be Single.

‚ÄčInstead of fretting over when we will be in our next relationship and how we can speed that up, I think we should embrace this time to be selfish.


Focus on self.  

Improve what you want to tighten up, 

Aspire to reach new goals, 

Explore new things and places, 

Grow….on purpose and with intention.
We are only single until we are in a relationship.

Make the best of it!

Once we’re in a relationship, we have to focus our attention on another person.  The balancing act of nurturing our relationship with both ourselves and someone else can be challenging.  
Enjoy having you all to yourself while you can. ūüôā

“Real Men”.

As I frequently reference the 3/5 compromise included within our Constitution while teaching my students to love and value themselves, I have to admit I become a little bothered by the phrase “Real Men” being used so loosely to describe a man that does or does not do certain things.  

The value of a man should not be predicated upon his actions.
While all men do not function as Kings, they are all most definitely, “Real Men”.  
When we use this phrase, we are insinuating, albeit indirectly and unintentionally, that there is another group of men who are not to be considered, Real.  

Real men cook.

Real men clean.

Real men provide.

Real men take care of their kids.

Real men are faithful and communicate.

This list goes on and on….

My question is, if a Real Man is defined by his actions, what happens if he becomes human and misses a beat?

What if one day he forgets to do something we consider to be the mark of a “Real Man”, and we are unable to check off the item from our long list of criterion?

Does that mean he is not, a “Real Man”? 

What if he doesn’t know how to cook, but he is willing to try?

What if he’s not in his children’s lives because his baby mama be on some bull?

What if he isn’t working because he got caught up in some poor choices when he was young and lacks education or has a record from childish mistakes that have made it difficult for him to get hired?

What if his family didn’t communicate, so he never learned how?

What if he gets tired of not measuring up to our expectations and looks for affection and understanding elsewhere?

Does that mean he isn’t a “Real Man”?

Our words are much more powerful than we realize!  

They emit an intense vibrational frequency that is invisible until it has shifted the thoughts of the recipient into action and manifested as outcomes.
When we speak love, truth, and acceptance, we can promote and reinforce the behaviors we actually want from our men.
Today, I challenge my sisters to honor our men by seeing them as they are at their core.  Build them up instead of implying they are somehow inadequate, insufficient, or in any way NOT a “Real Man”.

Instead, let’s call our our brothers “Kings”….even if they are still growing into their regal role and position.

Single, together.

‚ÄčI’m with only you, because I only want to be with you.

That’s my choice.

I’m not your woman.  

You don’t expect anything of me.

Yet, I am loyal.

Simply because I choose to be.

You make me feel good.

You make me smile.

You make me laugh.

You make me shudder.

You teach me. 

You comfort me.

You help me learn more about myself.

My growth supports yours.

Your growth  inspires mine.

No title can control my decision to  be faithful to you.

No label can force me to open my heart to you.

It’s simple….

I do so, because I choose to.

If you were “with only me, because you only wanted to be with me”,

I’d rather that whole phrase, than one word to replace it.

A title assumes an obligatory sense of responsibility.

A label is nothing more than a convenient way to summarize the extravagance of a beautiful relationship.

I am not against calling it what it is, but I am against calling it what it is not.

I don’t want a title that either of us have to grow into.  

We will only end up resenting the assumed responsibilities and limited freedom we have.

I don’t want a label that doesn’t match what we already are.

Otherwise, the contradiction between what we expect and what we already have, could cause us to drift apart.

So let’s just be…




Let’s explore:


Each other.

This love…

And call it what it is.